19/09/2018 08:24
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The Scottish Pool Association Non Pool Jokes
LOL!
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  LOL!
by: Claire, 01-10-2010 03:09 PM (#1)

A chauffeur picks Pope Benedict up from Edinburgh airport.
After getting all of Pope's luggage loaded into
the limo, and He doesn't travel light, the driver notices
that the Pope is still standing on the pavement.

'Excuse me, Your Holiness,' says the driver,

'Would you please take your seat so we can leave?'

'Well, to tell you the truth,' says the Pope, 'they never let me drive
at the Vatican , and I'd really like to drive here in Scotland today.'

'I'm sorry but I cannot let you do that. I'd lose my job!
And what if something should happen?' protests the driver, wishing he'd
never gone to work that morning.

'There might be something extra in it for you,' says
the Pope.

Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind
the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting
Turnhouse, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 105 mph.

'Please slow down, Your Holiness!!!' pleads the worried driver, but the
Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens. 'Oh, dear God,
I'm gonna lose my license,' moans the driver.

The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches, but
the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on
the radio.

'I need to talk to the Chief Inspector,' he says to the dispatcher.

The Chief Inspector gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's

stopped a limo going a hundred and five.

'So arrest him,' says the Chief Inspector.

'I don't think we want to do that - he's really important,' says the
cop.

The Chief Inspector exclaimed, 'All the more reason!'

'No, I mean really important,' says the cop.

The Chief then asked, 'Who have you got there, the Provost?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

Chief Inspector: 'Not Alec Salmond?'

Cop: 'Bigger.'

'Well,' says the Chief Inspector, 'Who is it?'

Cop: 'I think it's God!'

Chief Inspector: 'What makes you think it's God?'


Cop: 'He's got the f**ing Pope as a chauffeur!'
Claire



Posts: 438
Joined: 19.03.08
Location: Leekland - tidy!

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18/09/2018
I take it that their is no dress code for the 15s qualifiers folks

14/09/2018
Will the draw for 15s play-offs be done this week? Only 3 weeks away .

11/09/2018
Cheers bash, the deadline for Supers payments is now behind us, can't the draw be done sooner? Ta

10/09/2018
IM5 online now. Supers will likely be a couple of weeks

10/09/2018
When are IM5 and Super 15s playoff draws being announced? Cheers! Smile

10/09/2018
when is the draw being done for IM5? tyvm

10/09/2018
Sorry according to the rep all is good Smile

10/09/2018
I hope East Kilbride sent Im 5 results via a different source but They are Alex Campbell,Grant McNairn , Mark O'Brien

04/09/2018
Good at what he does but defo not a people person.

04/09/2018
I wouldny bother Davy Watson. Every question gets a smart arse comment from the Secretary.

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